Monday, May 14, 2007


It seems that most ambitious rulers of the male persuasion are felled with the same flaw. To be precise,if you have a penis then you are screwed.

Recently, presidential hopeful Tommy Thompson pleaded his little man in an embarrassing response to a question about gay rights.

The question was if an employer had the right to fire a gay person because the employer considered homosexuality to be immoral. Mr. Thompson answered, "I think that is left up to the individual business. I really sincerely believe that that is an issue that business people have got to make their own determination as to whether or not they should be." That is a clear and cogent answer but Thompson backtracked on his response after protests by saying that he was lost hearing in one ear and his hearing aid went dead in the other. So, how did he hear the question initially? When this answer did not suffice, Thompson explained that he had the flu and bronchitis and not only was he deaf but he had an urgent need to go to the bathroom.

While we have all had moments when nature's call has caused hasty exits at the most awkward of times, having reliance on one's plenipotentiary instrument can get you in trouble.

A case in point is that of Marcus Aurelius Antoninus also known as Caracalla for the hooded cloak that he wore. Caracalla was born Lucius Septimius Bassianus. His parents, Emperor Septimius Severus and Julia Domma renamed their son when he was seven to gain support from the powerful Emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius Antoninus Augustus. The Severus' had two sons, the youngest Publius Septimius Geta who was at heart an administrator and Caracalla who was a soldier. The elder Severus progeny was ruthless to the point of attempting the assassination of his own father. When Septimius Severus died (of gout), the two brothers were co-regent until Caracalla murdered Geta and his followers. Caracalla ruled with a bloodthirsty administration. He killed his father-in-law Lucius Fulvius Plautianus, his wife Publia Fulvia Plautilla and their daughter, and thousands of others that stood in the way of total power.

However, after only five years of rule, Caracalla made a fateful error in judgment. On April 8, 217, he requested privacy from his bodyguards to urinate and was promptly assassinated by Julius Martialis, an officer in the imperial bodyguard. Martilalis, who was hunted down and killed, either was angry about not getting a post as a centurion or was upset about Caracalla executing Martilalis' brother. With either reason, the disgruntled bodyguard proved once again that men in power or those who seek power should take care how their privates affect their public life.

Technorati Tags:,